Friday, August 23, 2013

Cross Country

With my feet squishing around in the mud, I peered down, already covered in dirt and mud. “On your mark” Mr Burt shouted, I instantly stood up straight.. “Get set” my eyes looked around at the ready girls. “Go!”. Everyone darted towards the first cone, jostling to get there first. All I’m thinking about is what to do. Should I sprint? Should I jog? Just taking easy was the key, I slowed down and kept myself at a good pace.

The scorching sun shone on my face, I felt like an ant being burnt with a magnifying glass. A bead of sweat rolled down my forehead. Coming up to the tight gate, I squeezed through with a couple of other girls.

Heavily breathing, I listened to the girls behind me huffing puffing. Running through the mud, it splattered all over my legs and clothes. I could feel the mud in between my toes, it irritated me. I felt my heart thumping against my chest about to burst out.

Running past the teachers and Service Academy boys really pushed me because of their encouragement. My ankles started to get sore, my legs were like jellies now. Every time I took a step, I felt like I was carrying two tons. “Almost there!” I thought. Suddenly, I realized I had to do two laps. Great! I carried on my second lap aching and tired.

“FINALLY!!” I saw the finish line just up ahead. I picked up the pace and sprinted to the finish line. “YAAY!!” I thought. My whole body was practically dying, I was so dehydrated. I was really proud of myself, I had done my best and came 6th which is really awesome!! I love cross country now!


  1. Hey Gloria,
    That's an awesome piece of work there. I love how you used different and interesting vocabulary in your sentences. I ended up with a lot of mud on my feet during the run and it sounds like you did too. It would be great if you could explain more about how you felt after the run. Anyway great work!

  2. O my gosh Gloria. I love the way you put words together. This is such an amazing piece of writing. Congratulations on coming 6th. Keep up the good work in both writing and running.


  3. Hey Gloria,
    I'm glad to hear that you had an awesome day on Cross Country. This piece of writing is extremely good. I like the different complex vocab you have used in text. It makes your writing a lot more interesting. Keep up the great work.

    Yours Sincerely,

  4. Hi Gloria,

    I loved you peace of writing and how you use experienced vocabulary's. Enjoy reading your story which was really fun to listen to. You also got me connected.... You seemed to to do well in the run by the looks of it. What an independent girl you are
    Keep Striving to Succeed!!

  5. Hi Gloria

    I enjoyed reading your story. Not only are you a good athlete, but also a very creative writer.

    Congrats on coming 6th.

    Keep up the great work.

    Meryl Hamer

  6. Awesome job Gloria! I think you did a great job and it definitely sounded like you tried your personal best to come 6th. I came 5th at my school. Will you be going to inter schools? Great job and I love the very interesting story. You really told the reader how tired you were feeling and how dirty it was! Keep it up Gloria!

  7. Awesome Job Gloria!,
    I think that you did a great job explaining your Cross Country run. I want to congratulate you on your run for never giving up and fighting to the finish line. You not only explained how dirty it was for you but you also make it sound so fun!
    Keep The Great Work Up!!

  8. Hello Gloria,
    Just finished reading your post and I thought it was awesome. It sounds like you really tried your best. I enjoyed your story so much I wanted to get up and run a 3.5 km run. Keep up the good writing.
    From Lisia

  9. Hey Gloria,
    I really enjoyed reading your story about Cross Country, it was really interesting. But there's some little mistakes but that's okay.

    Love Faa'ao